I'd be lying if I said I didn't

Waking up this morning, I felt like a god-damned ninja.


Last night, I got an e-mail from... Well, let's just say I've been waiting for that e-mail since the 24th of March. As I opened my mailbox, checked my mail, I did my happy dance, a few skips in the living room, and made a new happy dance that I immediately used to elaborate my happiness -- This all transpired while my mother and my (for all intensive purposes, I really don't know what to call the mother of your god-mother so...) grand god-mother were having a small snackage fest.

Yes. They were staring.

Anyhoot~ Yesterday was quite... interesting, I suppose. I've had a couple of realizations -- Some of which were soul-shattering (no, not really... But you get the point.), others were simply and purely disappointing. But hell, I'm not one to really take trivial things too seriously -- but experience will always slap me on both cheeks if I become too lax.

I wondered, as I was walking up the stairs to crash on my bed for the night, which was approximately eight hours ago, how my life has been since I moved schools; this is solely attributed to the fact that my dorm mate rummaged through my computer's files and found pictures that made her cute eyes bulge like billiard balls and her jaw agape -- last semester's photos of me, with long hair and all.

Yeah, when everyone takes a gander at my photos the first thought that crosses their mind is "WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED KIT" -- This never fails. I swear, it's almost priceless when I give them a smug look and answer with either "foood is goooood" or "well..." or...



So yeah. I've fallen in and out(?) of love this semester as well; Something that still bothers me to no end because from my point of view, IT'S A GOD DAMNED SHAME. But then again there are some things in this life that you can never have, even if you think, know and others can vouch that it's for you -- it goes and it never comes back. I still find myself musing at her every now and then. There were a few times she'd catch me, and god-knows-what she is thinking when she does. I guess I'm still not that quite over on the fact that things would've turned out differently. I guess I'll forever be a hopeless romantic.

AH BUT HELL~ That's too much drama for one paragraph, yeah?

I remember having conversations with both Serpent-san and my... Well, shall we say really extremely close lady friend about how I'm popular with the girls. I bet everyone would agree with my stand that I'M FUCKING NOT. I may know a lot of them, but I'm sure as hell not popular.

At least I know that I changed. I'd be lying if I said I didn't. I still do crazy things for girls like cutting my awesome long hair, stop smoking, actually sleeping on my bed and not on the floor or the sofa, learning how to fix my shiz no matter how much I love chaos (Serpent-san knows this, due to the fact that he's my roommate).

Ah, but there are things that will never change. Like how I will infallibly and inevitably be captivated by her despite how things have turned out -- this is, of course, until someone else comes along. Don't get me wrong, I'm not praying for the goddess of awe (if there is such a goddess) to pass by and have me love-struck and whatnot. It's just that sometimes, it's tiring to chase people you can't understand.

And it made me wonder. Come to think of it, she would be the third hard-to-understand girl I've fallen for.

Oh well. I'll leave you guys with a...


pictures are from
-- they be not mine mon~


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